We brake once more on the waves of our love.
Trying not to drown.
But your current rises below and above.
Fixing water crowns.
But a latent strength takes me beyond the seam.
Crashing me to the shore.
Littered by the ghosts of long dead dreams.
To haunt me, evermore.

Orbitam lunae in cartitate

Abound and in the air.
Tied down my heart for fear of flying.
Skim your clouds like a shuttle into space.
Rattling past the essence of life and time.
You take me higher.
Coughing out an atmosphere.
Pulling through your gravity to dance like moon daises.
Turning towards your sun to grow.
That face of you, eclipsing my world.
My new lunar religion.

Smartly Dressed Violence (Part xxviii)

Click here for previous entries  or  Listen to this episode


Nina had been part of the Order as long as she could remember. As long as there had been injustice there in the city, she and her family had worked tirelessly in countering all the abuse and mistreatment that those smartly dressed others unleashed on them all. Her pockets were deep, and her heart was deeper, and though she had little title within the order itself (she left the organising and structuring to others), she was a cornerstone in the fight for change. She trusted and loved those she worked alongside, offering her knowledge and tutorage to those she hoped could make a difference also. It pained her to see the world the way it was, the way it had been for too long. When casualties began to come, those kidnapped and executed, tortured for their cause; it moved an anger in her that needed to be directed somewhere positive.

With those members working on the science behind the change, and those field operatives who would expedition into the Altered for sources, Nina adopted the role of overseer. She put her own faith in the work of Dr Winkoski, and the lab team based in the temple to come up with something that could change things on a genetic level. Their task was long, and fraught with many setbacks. The Order needed to continue its assault on the deviant minded in the world, and especially the works of Aiko Tsutsumi and Atone industries which were the target of their rage.

Those fallen in this charge did not pass lightly through Nina’s mind. She remembered all those gone, and the latest with those who had died in the recent transporting of Levon and the Pope, and those securing the Pandora machines.

Nina lit the little candles that were encased in red glass in a small alcove in the church above the temple. To the world it was just another church, but to those in the Order it was their sanctuary and headquarters. Their operations ran from beneath St. Patrick’s cathedral. If she would have stepped outside its huge wooden doors, she would have been able to look up and see the looming towers of Atone industries which housed the Pandora machines. Secured now, but which had claimed some members. Though the battles were more muted than expected, the technology of Aiko and his robots were powerful and deadly.

She lit the candles respectfully, bowing her head in a silent prayer for those fallen.

Karen appeared behind her, Nina hearing her shoes echoing off the stone walls as she’d entered the cathedral from their secret door below. She did not turn to her, instead allowing her to come to her side and look at the candles that now glowed and bobbed in the cold night air.

“Too many now, and over the years.” Karen said, referring to the little flames that indicated a life.

Nina Sighed.

“Too many yes, but lost to a cause they believed in, and one that is just.” Nina replied. Her heart was heavy. They were close to something; she could feel that. But there were too many variables in play at the moment for her to be at any peace.

“It will be over soon; our work is coming to an end.” Karen offered, sensing Nina’s sombreness.

“I know, and I have hope for the best outcome. I just wish no others need suffer.” She said, quietly in her calm fashion. Karen understood, she knew how much Nina had lost personally in the fight over the years. They all had really. Nina was such an attuned soul, sensitive to a fault perhaps. It weighed on her heavily, having recruited so many in the past.

“Nina don’t lose hope or sight of what we are doing. This will correct everything, once it’s concluded. Think of all the good that will bring.” Karen said, hoping to lift her spirits.

“Yes, I know. I just hope we’re not too late.” Nina replied.

“What do you mean?” Karen asked her, confused.

“I hope that the people can still be changed, to something better. Their hatred is so ingrained, we do not know the psychology behind what they do. We can change the genetics and their make-up, but their minds and hearts. That I don’t know.” Nina said. Karen thought on this for a moment.

“ I’m sure Samuel will know what to do with that, he always has an idea about things out of the box.” She offered. Nina nodded to her.

“He did, he does. That’s why he has gone to the Altered.” Nina said.

“Then why are you so uncertain?” She asked her. There was a pause before she spoke again, as if caught in the dance of the candle flames.

“Because I fear it will cost him his own life to forward this change, and too many good souls have already fallen.” Nina said. They both remained quiet for a short time, staring at the flames, knowing that the end had perhaps begun.

“What is he going to bring back, what has he gone to get?” Jess asked Stefan, already anxious and now worried about what was happening. Stefan’s breathing was erratic, and it took some time to catch his breath before he answered.

“Before I managed to get away, he told me what he planned to do. He was so cold, detached almost. It was frightening to hear and witness. I knew I was about to die as he’d just murdered the doctor. He came up to me, and I saw it there in his eyes. Those black dead spaces filled with an essence so evil, evil is the only word I can describe it as. He told me his plans had changed, that the machines of god would now be the machines of Satan. He plans to bring a force from the Altered, bathed in this negative cloud that will destroy everything living.” Stefan said, now slumping to the floor.

Jess looked at Eva and Daniel, the other members surrounded him in rapt attention.

“Is this the dark entity that had been polluting the Altered?” Jess asked. Stefan shrugged.

“I don’t know too much about that world. Aiko was very secretive about it all and who had access to the information for his plans. I know he was to secure an essence originally, so I assume this is something similar. But he’s changed, corrupted. His eyes are poisoned by this darkness. I believe he will do anything now to have his revenge, or whatever he views it as.” Stefan replied.

Jess turned to Daniel now.

“Can this be done, over in the altered? Can a force be harnessed or weaponised and brought over?” She asked desperately. Daniel thought a moment. All members had been trained in understanding the Altered and its magical properties. With Daniel’s obvious technical proficiencies, she hoped he would know what Stefan was talking about.

“Well, we all use the magical to some degree as a weapon, but it’s scale is hard to quantify really. In theory he could manifest something from his own darkness if, like this man says; he has been so far corrupted. We know of the darkness there, but it wasn’t able to overcome the Pope’s power in the recent battle. He would need to defuse it into something from there that could be transported back, something of its construct.” Daniel offered, thinking things over.

“Like what, an organic object?” Jess suggested.

“Sort of, but it would need to be multilayered, able to contain and transition.” Daniel said.

“Like a person.” Jess said, a statement more than a question.

They all turned towards the bridge as they saw Aiko. The dark cloud that swirled above him was like a concentrated tornado, spinning and churning at a furious speed. It drew up into the fog of the Altered like a finger, blended away into the grey and the unknown beyond.

“Ai!” Exclaimed his mother, shocked by both his appearance before them and the sight of her son. His face was gaunt, shrivelled almost as if the cloud above him were sucking his insides out. He held a little green flame in his hand, the same he’d used at the Gates of Asher. They watched and waited to see what he would do. Aiko merely stood there, surveying them all; a hatred leaving him incapacitated it seemed.

“Ah, Ai; so good of you to join us.” Samuel said, in a jovial tone.

“Ai, what have you been doing?” Akari asked him, her eyes wide; perhaps prepared for anything.

Aiko turned, aiming his hand at the bridge. He let out what appeared to the others to be a scream, but to himself was a directed channel of energy. The green fire leapt from his hand, swirling in the black clouds from above and pulverised the bridge and the marker stones. The vaporized particles seemed to hover in their dismantled state for a second, before lifting off into the fog above like sand being tipped away upside down. A fracturing seemed to stem from the space, huge green cracks crawling out across the ground and reaching the others.

“Ai, stop this!” Akari screamed at him. But it did little good. The dark cloud, now energised further by the destruction of the bridge loomed toweringly, sparkling with Aiko’s green magic. He aimed it towards them, directing the force and the power straight at Samuel and Levon.

Levon was as quick as his father, tapping his wrist and uttering a spell. The words had just left his mouth as blackness covered them, washing over like a black tar.

Inside the vortex, a blue light glowed. Faintly at first, but it grew stronger. It thronged and pulsed as Aiko moved forward, closer to his family and Akari who were grouped together cowering from the onslaught before them. The fog of the Altered had peaked upwards, as if blown away by giant lips. A strange lightening storm raged up in the atmosphere now, strikes of green, white and blue punctured the clouds. Spitting and hissing like a giant snake coiling around them.

Out burst the white light which seemed to halt the dark which had attacked Levon and Samuel. It projected outwards, turning the dark matter to globs of stringy ash. Levon aimed his arms towards Aiko, a blue light streaking outwards towards him. But Aiko was quick and unrelenting, he aimed his own power back, slamming hard into Levon’s spell, stopping it in its tracks.

Akari rushed forward, breaking from her family, calling for Aiko to stop what he was doing. That it could all be better, but he must end this.

“It ends with me!” He yelled to her, aiming a strange green and orange fire towards her.

Levon reacted, lunging in her direction to protect her from what Aiko had sent her way. But the glowing fire had split, the green and orange separating. The green part of the spell shot towards Levon as he pushed Akari out of the way. The Orange part however caught her as she fell, encasing her in a strange, almost crystal-like confine.

Her family rushed forward, but Aiko aimed again. He was battling Samuel but managed to fire off further magical elements towards his family. Caught from his previous attack, Levon stumbled, half firing off some elements from his arms which now burned and singed green from the markings which ran up them. He missed his footing but dove with all his might to block the spell which was flying towards Aiko’s family. It collided with him in an array of green and black, and much like the bridge, Levon was broken outward into particles which hovered for a moment before pouring upwards.

“Levon!!!” Samuel yelled. He turned towards his son, but it was too late. In that moment, his own magic enchantment broke, and Aiko’s green and black torrent of cloud pushed him backward.

“All wars have sacrifices.” Aiko said, dryly. His words drifting over the strange landscape which now hung with loss. His family were scared to move, though his mother looked desperate to go towards Akari who was encased in her orange shell.

Samuel was on his knees, but he was not defeated. He spoke directly to Aiko, less tauntingly than previously.

“Aiko, please stop this. No one else need die for this.” He said, his hands out imploringly.

“Everybody needs to die for this. That’s what you don’t understand. I’m done with everything, none of this matters now.” Aiko said, twirling the green flame once again in his hands.

“It’s never too late to change, no one is ever too far gone. Despite what they have done.” Samuel said, casting an eye to where his son just stood.

“You’ve always been the ruler of this kingdom, and what a place to be king of. But look at it now, dead and empty. Just dust and fog. Why do you wish to save all this?” Aiko said, in almost a whisper but it tickled everyone’s ears.

“Because I believe this place can help change the material world and make it a better version then what it currently is. It’s not too late to do that still, with what you know Aiko; you can help also.” Samuel said, earnestly. But the others could see it was in vain.

“I don’t care.” Was all he replied, and he aimed his arms towards him once more.

In that moment The Pope surprised everyone. He leapt up from his space and dove towards Aiko’s family. He muttered a spell as he snaked around them pulling the ground up with his hands. The floor beneath reacted like elastic, moulding upwards to create a dome over them.

Enraged, Aiko fired off his own green flame and cloud once more, but it could not penetrate the forcefield that Samuel had created. Inside the dome, he suddenly produced a bright white flash and a few seconds later the family had vanished, and Samuel stood there as the dome broke away in patches, revealing him once again.

“Noooooo.” Was all Aiko could say as he charged towards him with such fury and anger that he leapt huge strides like a charging beast. The flames and the clouds bellowed forth, the storm raging above seemed to descend towards them in that moment. Samuel once again shot out his bright white light from his arms, the almost divine illumination shone through the dark, piercing it like tiny swords. A Little blue flash popped above his head and flew towards Akari, bursting at the top of her casing and slithering down like a broken egg.

Aiko charged and concentrated his full force towards Samuel, stopping moments before a concentrated pulse of his power emitted outwards and travelled towards him. Aiko dove out of the way of the retaliating magic and landed next to Akari. He muttered some words and dissolved away with her, leaving the space. It all happened in the blink of an eye. His final view of the Altered was of his powerful magic exploding with the Pope who fractured and erupted into a bright white flash. Just like the bridge and just like Levon.


Gravity not holding

To lift into a dream.
A sky that fits into your hand.
Let loose like the heartstrings of a melody,
that taps at your soul.
You breathe the air I need to survive.
Blown backwards like a northwest gale.
Billowing underneath these feathered sails.
Crystalize the weight that hangs heavy like the edge of space.
Skimming the clouds of your floating world.
To dive into the air of thought that passes between us.
That leaves me shaking like a night terror.
A heartbeat like a sleep kick.
These strings are made with each joint decision.
Tasselled and tied the rigging of a wandering star.
Leaving my hands covered in stardust.
And lungs of love full to burst.
I go silently into that pastel sky.
Watching the moments as I go.
Lifting off deep into your soaring kingdom.
Lifting once more into a dream.

Crawl beneath that folding wing

When it rained silver, I yearned to fly.
Broken winged and feathered down.
A mouth full of plume.
Patching this ache that weaves within.
Throwing your shadow over time.
Then force this need, on the backs of angels.
That terrible force threatening to take hold.
Once more, with feeling.
Begin this flutter with splintered souls.
Feeling it splutter into dust and memories.
These heaves of my heart.
I wonder now, and breathe then cry.
A falling star.
A fading sigh.


The sun illuminates such maddening visions.
Of logical paths I dare not tread.
A way to your soul that is covered in thorns.
The heat burns and chars like the wattle trees.
My bones like their branches.
Crumbling and dead.
Yet words you whisper on the Nullarbor winds.
Reach me over oceans.
Washing into my veins like scented magic poison.
An oxygen for my heart which longs to be with you.
So I twist towards the sun, though it burns in your direction.
Blaring up from below the equator.
Through a lens of love and reproach.
Like a plant feeling a new growth, bursting from my skin.
A love is grown again within.
Hoping to be potted, once again in your dusty soil.

Black box

Reaching for you as earth says its goodbye.
What is this thing that takes flight.
Soaring through uncharted and terror drenched clouds.
As I look for monsters out the window.
If this plane were to fall from the sky.
Tear into the ground, this thing wrapped in meaning.
Would it leave a hole in my heart? Would it turn me to dust?
A fallen bird needing to fly, this thing called love.

Smartly Dressed Violence (Part xxvii)

Click here for previous entries  or  Listen to this episode


Jess stood there once the clatter and the smoke died away, wondering if it wasn’t all a bit too easy. They had managed to push through the guards and the armed robots which had been surrounding the machine and the top floor. The battle had been swift, with much of the attack coming from Jess and the order. The robots did what they were programmed to do, but the guards had seemed hesitant to really go at them. They had folded quickly, retreating and abandoning their posts relatively easily.

Jess said this to one of the other members, a small woman by the name of Eva.

“I know what you mean, it’s as if they were just going through the motions or something.” Eva said, throwing a robot to one side which had been sparking frantically.

“Are we sure this is the correct machine, or if this is the right place?” Jess asked, to both Eva and the others. They all surrounded the machine now, some of the members dealing with the stray robots which had been whirling and continuing on as the guards had fled. It was Daniel who spoke.

“Yes, this is definitely the machine. But having a look at it now, there isn’t anything set for release.” He said.

“Are we sure the timing is right?” Eva asked. One of the members contacted the temple to check in and to ask them this also, his wrist illuminating. Jess went across to the Pandora machine now. The huge apparatus looked like a giant upside-down wish bone, its two arms pointing up into the air. At its base there was an empty receptacle, presumably where the pathogen would go. It was voluminous, the size of a small hover pod.

“These conductors stimulate the contents and distribute them equally up these wands. The levels have to be equal or the distribution would malfunction here.” Daniel said, pointing to two valves up the sides of one of the wands. Jess could see a strip of little holes like that on a flute, with pressure lights pulsating underneath.

“So with ours mixture, we need to have the correct consistency also, or just for the distribution outward?” Jess asked him, not really sure of the science to it all. She was happy with the magic, and elemental nature which worked in a space she didn’t have to understand. But the nature of science always confused her.

“Both really, they obviously planned for a consistency of equality throughout the release, if it changes as it propels; it will shut down. I guess this was to avoid uneven distribution.” Daniel said. Jess looked at him like a child might, not getting what he was saying. He registered her confused expression.

“It means they were probably aware it was unstable, and they built in a failsafe. It’s good really that they didn’t want to just release something that was not controlled, or what they expected.” Daniel said, looking over the machine further.

“Very surprising from Mr Tsutsumi really.” Eva added, her brow furrowed.

One of the other members walked over to them, speaking to the temple and drawing the others to listen too.

“So we have the other machine, is that correct?” He asked into his wrist where a little image of a head floated.

“We have secured the other site yes, but there is an absence of material.” The little head replied, fuzzing in and out of clarity.

“Same here, we have the machine no problem. But there’s no agent to be seen, or even plans to upload one.” He said.

“Okay, remain with the machine, and let me get back to you as quick as I can. We’ve had some developments here, and we need to know if it’s safe to release the holy water still.” The head said. Jess could make out it was Dr. Winkoski. They all turned and looked at each other, wondering what to do next.

Karen clicked off the call and turned to face Nina, who stood holding two cups of tea. She handed one of them over to her.

“So we have the machines, just no presence of the virus. Were we off with our information, had Aiko not precured his source?” Karen asked her, she blew on the rim of the cup.

“No, it’s not that. We know he has his manufactured agent, and he needed a source from the altered to combine with this. This has been planned for a while. Something must have gone wrong. His encounter with the Pope must have changed things for him.” Nina said, sipping from her own cup.

“Then his plan has shifted since returning, presuming that he did. We don’t really know what took place there.” Karen said.

“No, not entirely. We know he was stopped entering the gates of Asher, but what state the Pope left him in is anyone’s guess. We can’t move forward with our own until he is accounted for. We don’t know what back up plans he has developed, or what reaction technology he may have devised. People like Aiko always have another route to take. We must locate him before we release ours.” Nina said, a worried expression hovering on her face for a moment before disappearing.

“What did he say when you spoke?” Karen asked, referring to the Pope.

“That they were to take Aiko’s family into the altered, and that he would follow. I said we’d buy him some time. We’ve got the machines secured now; we just need to wait to hear from him.” Nina said, looking at Karen in a way that conveyed her thoughts on the Pope’s communication abilities, or lack thereof.

“I see, well he does have Levon with him. Perhaps he will be more communicative.” Karen offered.

“I hope so too.” Nina said, sipping more of the tea, which burnt her tongue.

Levon felt cold there for the first time. Usually in the Altered there was little change in temperature, the atmosphere was always heavy and hung like a humid day, the temperature always warm. But he shivered, the fog swirling around them. He had long ago learnt how to manipulate the surroundings of the world there; the emotions and thoughts usually constructed the space around you. But here now, there was a cold deadness, as if the Altered was no longer receptive, but in a state of sleep. Reduced back to its default it seemed.

“You feel it also?” Samuel asked Levon, noticing him shiver along with Aiko’s family.

“I’ve never known it like this before.” Levon said. The girl before them then spoke.

“It’s trying to repair; something has attacked the fabric of this world.” She said, helping the older woman get to her feet.

“She’s right. Aiko’s darkness had spread too far and wide. When he tried to get through the gates of Asher, he unleased a huge amount of negative energy. The Altered is trying to heal, trying to shift. The test in the Limbo only made things more unbalanced. Like people, it can only take so much.” Samuel said.

“Who are you?” The girl suddenly asked him. She was young, around twelve. Much younger than Aiko.

“I’m Samuel, good to meet you. And this is Levon.” Samuel said, motioning to his son.

“I’m Akari. Thank you for rescuing us. I don’t remember much, but I do remember those horrible tubes in the facility.” She said. Her family were quiet, slowly understanding where they were.

“You’re welcome, and you’re all safe now. But what did you mean that you had come from the Altered?” It was Levon who asked, he had been watching the family; they all seemed relieved to be there and together.

“What do you think I mean? I came from here; it was where I was…constructed I guess you could say.” She said, matter-of-factly.

“You’re a spirit of this place, taken into form?” Samuel asked. The girl nodded.

“Wait, I don’t understand. Are you Aiko’s sister?” Levon asked, clearly perplexed.

The older woman put her hand on the young girl’s shoulder then and spoke.

“You have saved us, and we thank you. This is Ai’s doing, we know this.” She said, her accent heavy with Japanese. Samuel nodded in recognition. The woman muttered something, shaking her head.

“He denies us, he forgets us. He tries to bury us. But we cannot be forgotten.” She said, her eyes alert, betraying her sad, aged face.

“Ai isn’t my brother. I wouldn’t call him my father either, but he was the one who brought me over. I live in both realms, on separate plains.” The girl said, a fragile tinge to her words, yet she stood assuredly.

Samuel turned to Levon.

“Aiko unlocked the essence of spirits here, while exploring the magic. Reversed engineered somewhat. His scientific approach to this place, probably how he tried to understand things. Whenever we want something, we must give something back. He traded part of himself to absorb more of the essence of the Altered. He takes it to a dark place, because he does not know how to handle the power properly. The Altered, being what it is, created Akari here, from his particles.” He said. Levon could see a world of knowledge in his father’s eyes.

“The nice parts!” Akari said, smiling.

“You betcha.” Samuel added, smiling back to her.

“We care for her; we raise her as our own. But she deserves more than what we can offer. We cannot rid ourselves of the SIN which keeps us in place.” The old woman said sadly.

“And Aiko knows all this?” Levon asked?

“Knows and tries to hide. But he can’t be rid of us, or me at least. If I die, Aiko dies.” Akari said.

“You’d think he’d keep you safe, protected somewhat. Not living on the west-side where things are hard and dangerous.” Levon said.

“We live in love there, we survive.” The older woman said, almost defiantly.

“Ai does not know everything that we do, or where I am all the time. I know his movements, and when he is in this place.” Akari said.

“Then you should have known I was stood right over here then.” They heard from a voice over by the bridge. They looked across to see Aiko stood there in his suit, a dark cloud swirling above his head.

“What developments do you think she meant?” Jess said, anxious after the call with Karen.

Eva shook her head, not knowing herself. Daniel was examining the machine further, looking over the controls and the entry module for the pathogen.

“Well, at least we know they can’t release the virus now. That’s something.” She said, she was trying to convince herself more than the others. Something felt off to her.

“But where is it then, our information had them releasing both of them tonight.” Eva added, sharing the concern.

“We need to talk to someone, to get some information. Any of those guards conscious?” Jess asked, motioning to some of the security team they had already fought with.

“Nah, we did too good a job.” One of the temple members said, checking the guards.

Just as he said this, Jess spotted something out of the corner of her eye. Something moved off around the corner of a wall.

“Be right back.” Jess said, hurtling over a fallen robot and heading off towards the movement.

Jess was quick, and the person was slow. She seized Stefan by the back of his neck, spinning him around.

“Gotcha.” Jess said, and he let out a tiny yelp. She marched him back to where the other’s stood, the alarms had finally stopped, and an eerie silence had fallen on the scene.

“Who are you?” Eva asked him as he stood before them and the machine.

“Please, don’t hurt me.” Stefan said, looking around at the others on the floor and the remains of the robots. His suit was a mess, patches of oil sprayed up his leg, and his suit jacket was dirty and torn; a line of blood stained his collar.

“Don’t give us reason to.” Jess said, nudging him with her weapon. “What is happening here, where is the virus you intended to release?” She asked him.

“It’s all gone wrong, it’s all failed. Aiko has gone mad, he’s deranged.” He said. He was not hysterical, more of a defeated man who had his world rocked, and his illusions shattered. He had been brought up in a world where there was a clear system and order to the disapprobation of those with SIN. Aiko had fallen in his eyes, and everything now seemed unclear.

“We know this, but where is the virus?” Eva pressed.

Stefan looked around, as if surprised it was not up by the machine.

“If it’s not here, then the consignments weren’t moved up from the containment sector in the lower levels. We have the laboratories and higher risk units underground. Aiko didn’t ascertain the material from the other place for it to impart with our agent.” He said, letting his head hang.

“So we were right, it’s not set to be released now. We need to check the same at the other site.” Eva suggested.

“What happened to Aiko?” Jess asked Stefan as one of the members began to contact the other team, having been unable before.

“He surprised us, I was trying to save us all really. Keeping his family safe. He’d moved to a mental sphere that I couldn’t understand. His actions were beyond cold, calculated. But when the others took his family, he was enraged. He murdered the doctor, and I barely escaped myself.” Stefan said.

“What others.” Jess asked him, not concerned who the doctor was. Stefan looked more awkward, shifting nervously. Then he sighed heavily.

“We had intercepted some people from that other realm, we had some fatalities but two were kept in stasis. Aiko had plans for them, but they were able to get free. They attacked me and the doctor, before disappearing with Aiko’s family, presumably to that other realm.” He said.

“An old and younger man?” Jess asked, knowing who he meant.

“Yes, one who’s abilities I’ve never seen with such power.” He added.

“And they took them to the Altered? What about Aiko?” Jess asked, hastily.

“He is mad, insane. The things he wants to do now. No one is safe.” Stefan said, clearly shaken.

“But what is he going to do, where is he now?” Jess said, the urgency frantic in her eyes.

“He plans to kill everyone he can, he’s gone to the Altered after them, and he’s bringing back something that will do more damage then these machines ever could.” He shook his head, defeatedly.


Lonely tree

In the forest, all alone.
My lonely tree feels cold as stone.
Surrounded everywhere by its branches.
That bend and twist to their own advantage.
They shake in the wind, and shiver in sadness.
Sunken in a disturbing madness.
Until one day you came into the woods.
Scared the animals and riding hood.
Yet the wolves they ran, and hid like rabbits.
Convoluted out of their own bad habits.
And into my glade you stepped so proudly.
And struck a match and yelled out loudly:
“Love is a flame that burns us under!”
And as quick as lightening, you lit me like thunder.
So my lonely tree, burned quick and sadly.
And I faded away, into death quite gladly.

Skyward pines


Today I went hiking on my own. I went up to the cathedral pines, there was no-one around. The weather played a part as it was raining most of the day. But the trail goes through the huge forests there so it was covered mostly. I waited until late afternoon as I wanted to catch the sun slipping away to sleep, to feel the trees awaken with the night. Creepy and weird I know, but I felt so much at peace. Probably not the safest of things to do, but I can handle myself…at least I think I can. There was much stillness coupled with feverish noises dotted about the place. I was amazed at how high some of the trees climbed, what energy is involved to create this thing that scratches the sky; all from a tiny seed. Nature never fails to amaze me. Such beauty and wonder nestles in those trees.

girl woods night


Under the trampled feet of the ghosts of the forest.
We lay in the soil, safe for a century.
Soaking the world in.
We turn away from forever, looking into the eyes of life.
Shooting, skyward.
Oceans away from the city of conformity.
An exquisiteness that waivers every day.
At the whim of the winds.
We are the pines.
Skeletons in season, breaking beauty as we trail the atmosphere.
Still as the tomb of tomorrow.
We watch the forest shiver and shake to a human beat.
Still with a taste of god in our mouths, breathing in his breath.
Dancing in the darkness as the world sleeps.
These pines.
Waiting once more to be cut down by those seeking our answers.
To get at the truth, down in our roots.

Taken from ‘Nothing But I Am’ 


Hentan House – Feast Preparation


I finally felt like I could relax and not worry about how others saw me. These women had lifted me out of the ice chamber with praise and encouragement. They all smiled when I said I wanted to do it again because they too felt the same way. And just as I had been dunked into the ice it was me now who held the wooden lid shut as the rest took the plunge. “Hold down with all your weight.” A few said as I placed my palms on the wood in bated breath. I was pressing down with all my strength as the old lady scratched against the lid. I could feel some sort of exhilaration building in me, heavier than the fear I felt in the well, that lingered on the edge of my mind. Pushing me to think unnatural things; hold it just a little longer, just…

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Elemental till the end

Could you conceive these unfolding events?
That distance is my tendency.
Collapse will devour me.
And all these complexities.
The psychoses that trail like a comet.
Shooting across your blanketed sky.
No surface, all feeling.
Scars burn, never healing.
As you slip another cosmic fire right into my eyes.
To dazzle and confuse.
To haunt, and amuse as I detach and fall like Apollo out of the sky.
I know we are cut from the same cloth.
Silk chewed into jagged pieces by fate.
When the violence in this love ebbs, and the tide falls away.
You come to me, covered in shells.
Hoping for an embrace which always leaves me incomplete.
And my soul crumbling, like a tooth stuck in candy.
Fizzing away in its own ecstasy of decay.
Will you know me from somewhere?
Faceless or feathered, familiar and ill equipped.
Pulling your earth in and out of my skin.
Always wanting more.

Something to stay awake for – Troll

Listen to this episode.

When a person or neighbour in your village cries out “troll”, lock your children inside the house and keep your hunting rifle by your side. I used to believe they were only children’s tales supposed to scare the kids from stepping deep into caves or under bridges. They had bright pink hair and you stuck them onto the end of your pencil. There was nothing to fear because they were nowhere to be seen.

This all changed a few years ago. I was walking Hunter through the forest on a warm Summer’s day. He was off the lead and jumping through bushes and hopping over streams and rarely waited for me. But when I stopped to tie my shoes I looked up and he was gone. There was nothing but the faint groans of pigs. I moved through the bushes closer to the noise and to stop Hunter from scaring the animals. Clearing through the bushes I saw what looked like three children all dressed in black. They were hopping around the front of a cave and throwing something between them. I stepped closer and noticed they were not children at all. Standing four-foot-tall and covered in wiry black fur.

They squatted at the entrance and squealed as they chucked something against the rocks. Stamping the ground and smashing their swollen grey hands down onto the item like they were pressing grapes for wine. Their faces were a mess of mangy hair and bulbous snout covered in warts. For a second, I caught sight of their small pebble black eyes scan the trees. I stood horrified as one flung the creature they had been stomping on to the other. Amidst all the blood I saw one of the trolls spinning Hunter’s collar between its fingers. They were throwing my German Shepherd around like he was nothing more than a wet towel. They squealed and painted their cave red with his blood. Only after some time had passed, they finally grew bored and lazily clambered back into the darkness. As I stood there paralysed in fear the last thing I heard where the echoed howls of twenty more.

When I returned to the village and told them of the trolls the older men looked at me displeased. They said they had warned us many times of the trolls, but no-one listened. It was several days later when I heard that they had built a fence around the cave and done nothing more. Looking back now I agree with how they handled it. It was too much of a risk to try and fight them as an angry troll will often follow you home and sniff out your loved ones. Best to let them lay in their caves and hope you don’t catch their eye.

Story by Harley Holland
More fables here.

Smartly Dressed Violence (Part xxvi)

Click here for previous entries  or  Listen to this episode


Jess could recall a countless number of times in her life when she had been attacked by ‘The Others’. Physically beaten, verbally assaulted. One time when she was a teenager she was pushed down a flight of stairs, backwardly tumbling step after step back down into the recess of the city and out of sight; all because someone thought she shouldn’t be somewhere where she could be seen. By those others who moved about in their own gilded self-contained world, always consuming; yet never giving back.

She thought of these instances as the faces of these others blurred past her. The smartly dressed ones who had been drinking coffee, and then cowered quietly out of the way. The more they made their way through the tower, Jess noticed more of a mix of people which was unknown for this location in the city. As many of the workers had relocated from other facilities, and those already operating and living in the tower prior to this; a strange fusion of peoples now occupied the tower. Aiko had inadvertently mixed the two groups together, maintaining control through a shared goal. She could tell they were mixed, something about those with SIN she could always spot right away, like an internal scanner she passed before them. It was a habit, something she did without thinking about it. She was now trying to save everyone, regardless of what their cells said about them, or how they had treated her in the past.

She passed them all now, those with and without residing in the tower that looked out to sea; climbing up to god.

She and the other members rode the elevator a certain way, then exited out again, making their way through further residential and office spaces. Their map projections were taking them a way that was to avoid any unneeded confrontations, accessing the areas where there would be more people but less security. They moved quickly and found themselves at some hover pods which would take them right to the top where they new the machines were located, both here and in the other tower.

They all climbed aboard, the scanner moving over them a few times, scanning fruitlessly until Daniel overrode the system once again. The scanner recoiled back into its compartment and the hover pod, which looked like the top of a glass, floated upwards towards the higher floors, carrying them silently. They were a much nicer way to move around, though none of the group sat on the luxurious white leather seats. Before too long they had reached the top and Jess could see that their job was about to get a lot harder.

There were guards and security robots everywhere they looked. The floor was a strange mix of open plan arrangements with little hives dotted about the place, rooms they guessed which were more private. Over to one side and encased in glass they could see a machine, jutting out into the outside part of the building which loomed over the city. It was dark, and the outside lights were turned off, though pulses of red flashed repeatedly from the red safety light that adorned the very top of the tower.

They all looked at each as the hover pod came to a gentle stop and hoped they enjoyed their time there. Jess and the order were able to act only a fraction of a second before they were spotted, and an incessive alarm rang out alerting everyone to their presence. Though Jess would regret anyone getting hurt, she was so struck by the adrenaline that coursed through her, that much of the fight was a blur to her. A frantic show of lights and flashes, of strange noises and robots descended in sparks and screams.

Stefan looked at Aiko’s family, all of them suspended in the same glass tubing that had housed both Levon and his father. The room was much the same, if not larger and with a window. Or what was meant to be a window, they were still underground and the vast glass space on the wall simulated outside views to give the working space a less subterranean feel. Synchronised to the time of the day, the current view was that of a harbour at night, the boats bobbing on the gentle waves as the lights of the dock peppered the water.

All of them were there, though this only amounted to a handful of them. Aiko had been able to pull himself out of the mud of his circumstance, but his family had not. They had withered and struggled, suffering more than most due to the compendium of hinderances and genetics that had cruelly disposed on them. His parents had survived, and one of his grandparents. But of his immediate family, there was only a sister remaining.

Stefan tapped the glass like he was in an aquarium, and the girl flashed her eyes open to him. He stepped back, alarmed.

“They can’t do anything, fear not. We’re controlling their muscles and brain activity anyway. I could make her if I wanted, but best not to play with them.” Dr Camogue said, pulling up a screen before her.

“So, they are all healthy and fine?” Stefan asked, looking across to the other bodies in the tubes.

“I don’t quite know about healthy, they lived over on the West Side. Their SIN levels are off the charts too, I can’t believe Aiko came from this?” She said, registering disbelief.

“But they’re fine?” Stefan pressed.

“Yes, you can see they are.” She replied, sliding the screen and looking over more information which glowed with red and white lights.

“They need to be strong for the extraction you said, I’m just making sure. And that they won’t be harmed.” Stefan added. She looked at him.

“Trust me, I know what I’m doing. They are fine for the procedure.” The doctor said. Stefan nodded.

“I know, and sorry if you think I’m being difficult. A lot rides on this. If everything falls apart, and Aiko doesn’t get the results he’s hoping for. We need them as insurance. There’s a secret locked inside of them, as these results show.” Stefan said, his hand pointing to the little hovering screens in front of the tubes.

It seemed to give a read out of the occupant’s vitals, along with a series of flashing numbers and signs. These, as Stefan had come to learn, were mutated coding markers in their genetics. Aiko had gotten out of the mud, so to speak, but the silty world of his family’s make-up held a secret about his own evolutional path that was unique to the Tanakas. For that mud had been sprinkled with its own magic.

“It’s fine, I get it. But don’t worry. We’ll extract what’s needed and keep them in stasis until everything unravels. This facility is protected anyway, so whatever goes on upstairs will not affect anyone here. They’ll remain unchanged.” Dr Camogue said, before continuing. “Though I am making sure that my own body gets that super boost Aiko is promising, even with a little help from mother nature.” She said, eyeing him.

“What do you mean?” Stefan asked curiously.

“Well, we can all do with a little enhancer; let’s just say I have my own little medicine to take when the process begins.” She said, almost proudly.

“You sure that’s safe. All of this is based on a magic that is still hard to comprehend.” Stefan said, unsure.

“There you go, doubting again. Don’t.” She said, and though was playful, Stefan sensed a nastiness lurking there. “It’s all under control.”

She said this with such certainty, it was a strong emotion that hung on her face as it, she and Stefan were frozen to the spot.

Levon and Samuel had entered the room and expecting to find someone; had come prepared. A quick incantation from Samuel had used the condensation from the tubes to collect and then snake across both Stefan and Dr Camogue. The magic had frozen their bodies in place as the water travelled across their skin.

“That’s Stefan Ruud, he’s Aiko’s assistant.” Levon offered, going with his father towards the frozen pair. “What do they want with the Tanakas?” Levon asked his father, who was looking at the Doctor.

“Could be many things, good or bad. I know the good doctor here has a history of experimenting, so it’s probably best we get them away from her.” He said, something in his eyes told Levon he knew a lot more about her.

“Are they able to go in this state, or do we need to release them first.” Levon asked, looking at the tubes which bubbled away slightly. He felt the solution on his own skin for a moment, reminded of his own confinement a short time ago.

“Well, they can…” Samuel began, but what they could do Levon never found out.

The door to the room had opened and Aiko Tsutsumi stood there, his black eyes taking in the scene.

“Your eminence.” He said, mockingly towards The Pope.

Samuel turned to look at him but remained calm, no sign of surprise took him.

“Ah, Ai. Good to see you, a little family reunion it seems.” He said.

Aiko looked at the glass tubes, which seemed to conclude his suspicions. Levon went to move forward in an attack, but his father held his hand up to stop him.

“And what is going on with these people then? As for family, I would be pressed to use that word.” Aiko said, moving further into the room.

“Well, it seems your friend Stefan and the Doctor here have a nice little plan for them. I hope it was to keep them safe while you tried to ruin the world, but I fear it might have been something more untoward.” Samuel said.

There was just a tiny flicker in Aiko’s eyes, but he shook it off and continued.

“They mean little to me.” He said.

“As do many it seems now, but it doesn’t have to be this way.” Samuel said.

“Yet it is. What are family but a letdown. What are others, besides an annoyance. A great purge is coming, and I believe I will be better off on the other side of it.” Aiko said, quietly.

“There is more than just you in this world Aiko. And indeed, another world where you are equally at odds.” Samuel said, watching both Aiko And Levon, trying to control both.

“That world will fall too.” Aiko replied, his hands moving to his arm slightly. Samuel noticed this.

“Don’t do anything that will mean you are forever lost Ai.” Samuel said.

“Don’t call me that.” Aiko replied, almost in a snarl. And he reached towards a dial on his suit, the same as he had worn to go into the Altered.

But Samuel was quicker.

He flicked his hand around, sending the water that had encased Stefan and the Doctor and flung it against the glass tubes. Both Stefan and Dr Camogue unfroze, staggering for a moment on the spot. Samuel then grabbed his son, and with his other hand tapped a sign on his wrist and muttered some words quickly.

A green vapour had begun to emit from Aiko’s own suit, but he was not matched with The Pope’s swiftness. They had vanished in a flash and Aiko was left with the vapour pooling around the room with the glass tubes now empty, and Stefan and the Doctor looking at him in surprise.

They arrived at the bridge; the huge marker stones loomed before them as the bridge spanned out into a fog. Levon stumbled, and he caught himself. He saw his father now, bent over, wheezing as one might after a huge run. Around them were the bodies of Aiko’s family, their eyes closed but they did not look dead, more like asleep. They had arrived hard, and some of them had collapsed onto each other.

“Are you okay?” Levon asked his father, who stood with his hands on his knees.

“Yes, yes…. just that took a lot to do.” He said, as if trying to catch his breath.

Levon went across to check on the family, and they all seemed okay. Indeed, the younger girl had begun to stir, opening her eyes and sitting up slightly.

“Hey.” Levon said, going over to her.

“What the hell is going on?” She said, angrier then scared.

“Far from hell, you can rest assure my dear.” Samuel said, getting himself together.

“There’s a lot to tell you, but you’re safe; so don’t worry.” Levon said, offering a smile. She returned one, calmed by his nature.

“Okay, but why are we in the Altered?” She asked.

Both Levon and his father looked at her, taken aback.

“You’ve been here before?” Levon asked.

“Of course.” She replied, getting to her feet. “It’s where I came from.”


Fake Dawn

The stars are so bright tonight.
It sounds childish, that you want it to last forever.
You see the same in my eyes.
Stretching the night.
Trusting the darkness.
Tomorrow was a failure.
Today is weakened by the sight of it.
That returning thought of Saturn.
Shrinking once more into the horizon.
You marked it there.
When you had nothing to lose.
It’s easy to hope for the dawn to take you.
Easy to grapple that hand of mine into yours.
Sending postcards and roses to your sixteen year old self.
A secret message that you made it.
It’s harder to wipe the sleep from your eyes.
Harder to beckon the day.
Which threatens to stain us like the ones before.
When we were lonely.
And afraid.

When you think about your life, I surround you in gentle sympathy

Oily hands which pin warnings to the walls of your paper cathedrals.
Closing their eyes to the view of sorrow.
It stretched before them, and under your skin.
Cool, when not engulfed in such flames of disgust.
Little cracks in stone, slowly crumble pillars of discontent.
The columns that held our gods too high.
Out of reach, on the horizon.
How can we touch the finger of god.
When we choose to crawl on swollen bellies.
Pick the needle which will penetrate the precious heart.
Kept in glass, and passed down and around but never treasured.
Wake up those angels which sleep inside.
Do not run and hide, from a future which began yesterday.
Tip the grey to another shade and shake out a song.
One which can be played at any funeral.
Signalling a death of something, and the beginning of such wonder.

Smartly Dressed Violence (Part xxv)

Click here for previous entries  or  Listen to this episode


She couldn’t help it, it felt like going to war. This battle was to take place high above the city, looking down at the buildings that housed the inhabitants they hoped to save. Not that many cared or might even know of the lengths Jess and the order were to go to. They bustled about mostly in their ignorance, their little worlds the most important to them, theirs the most special. Once this was all over, Jess hoped that they could all start again. Her family had changed on a cellular level after the test, but their memories remained the same. They would never erase the years of mistreatment, oppression or injustice they had endured. Physically they hoped to change things, but people’s consciences and minds will be harder to evolve. That would be the next battle, Jess was sure.

But for now, her task lay before her. To get to the top of this building and put a stop to a machine that could end it all for everyone. Eyes on the prize she said to herself.

They exited out of a small wooden door that inconspicuously sat opposite the huge tower building. The HET facility had been completed a while ago but only recently had taken in the influx of staff who had relocated there. They had travelled through underground tunnels the Order used to maneuverer around the city unseen. They stepped from the forgettable small building they had arrived within, and down the laneway that led across to the tower. Their sources had told them of that all of Aiko’s sites had infused his technology with matter taken from the Altered. Unless you were looking, you would not be aware of such a system. Hiding in plain sight. But Jess and her small group of Order members were all too aware of how impotent somewhat they were now in using their magic.

They crossed the road and made their way into the transport hub that attached to the tower. The sheer glass frame housed the transport station, and they could enter the building here and access the floors they needed to. Aware of security, they moved almost stealth like through the station and were able to make it inside; despite their attire being a cause for alarm. It was late, and many people had left the building for the day. Despite this, many workers lived in the building, having been a part of the relocation project. So they had to be quick.

They made their way to the service areas where they came across their first obstacle. Security service robots had flagged their entry, and their lack of authorisation passes. They had descended quickly, and Jess and the members moved swiftly to disarm and disengage them. Now they were on the clock, as they knew their presence was no longer a secret. Jess took a final lunge at the remaining robot, pulling out its connective cording in its neck, the robot firing off it’s weapon at random as the sparks flew also from its head.

They left them where they fell and hastily made it to the service elevator and quickly ascended the building. Reaching only to level 89 their elevator stopped with a jolt and emergency warnings began to ring out exclaiming their breach of permission. They were quick and made it out of the roof of the elevator to get to a floor. They could see more robots descending down the huge shaft, their lights and metal glowing like a moving blur towards them. Like wild animals in a foggy night. They made it quickly through into level 90, prizing the doors apart and ducking out of the threat approaching them.

The floor was residential, and a café greeted them as they tumbled out onto the level. People were sat drinking their drinks, looking over to see the sight of Jess and the order members hurtling into their space. Nobody screamed or yelled, but frantic devices were reached for as they ducked out of sight. Jess thought this an odd reaction, a silent knee-jerk to an imposing threat. Maybe they had trained for something like this she thought, but she didn’t have long to think about it as the door behind them was heaved apart by the robots, and more seemed to swarm now across the way on the other side of the café.

They all bolted right in a unified front, escaping the robots from the elevator and discharging those that confronted them down the hallway. It was loud and frantic, shots and yells rang out, as lights flashed also. In an attempt to contain them, the security systems blasted the area with pressurised vapour, similar to liquid nitrogen. The order members were able to navigate through this, using quick self-contained enchantments which made them glow with a little blue film. The magic unheeded so far. The robots caught in the vapour were stuck and frozen to the spot, allowing them to slip past them and make it to another elevator terminal. Here one of the members, Daniel who as the youngest of the group aside Jess, overrode the operating system for the elevator and they bundled inside as it sped up again towards the 208th floor, where their next and final assault would take place.

Aiko moved across the large room, walking by the huge windows that opened out into the nights sky. If he’d had looked, he would’ve seen the lights of the bay over on the west side pulsing, the emergency warning systems initiating in locking down the area. Instead, his black eyes made their way quickly to the huge orb that rotated up on a small platform. Aiko eyed it closely. Much like the globe Jess had seen in Nina’s place, this one represented the Altered. Aiko had never seen it like this before. It spun and shook, vibrating manically as lights of green and blue flashed around it like little electrical storms.

The cloudy covering whirled and hissed, and he could see the very fabric of the space was being unstitched and re-stitched again, removing what was already there. The world was in a flux, or some sort of expunging. He wondered how this would reverberate in the material realm. Just as he thought this, he was drawn to the sky which was ripped apart with a huge bolt of turquoise lightning. It sped out into the bay before more forks began to snake across the sky, little dragons hurrying across the inky canvas.

He knew then he could not go to the Altered now. He barely survived his last trip, and now the whole structure of the place seemed to be regenerating to something beyond his understanding. He needed a source for his machines, but now this would not happen. He turned to look once more at the globe, seeing the little lightening dragons now over the material realm. He pinpointed his city there, his tiny speck of space that his empire resided. He thought of the people, those he was trying to change and those he wanted to seek revenge on. And then he laughed out loud, to no one but the empty room.

All his efforts had been to manipulate the magic for his own means. His own god complex, which he wasn’t too dissociated yet to not comprehend, it had made him make reckless and pointless choices. What did it matter if these people changed, or evolved? What did it matter if he removed the lower regarded ones and cleaned up the space for others? He found he didn’t care for anything or anyone now. People annoyed him, they hassled him, pulling his attentions always in another direction. He had hoped that similar minded and duplicated versions of himself, genealogically speaking, would make things better. But now he came to realise that this would never really end. He looked at the globe and realised how many people would need to be changed, how big the world actually is. How there would always be a resistance, a re-lapse, a revolution.

He dipped his finger into the orb, the static lightning and plumes of vapour nipped at his finger. He noticed that it turned black, staining his skin. He removed it from the orb and looked at this up towards the light. The blackness remained, like he had dipped his finger in ink. All black, as he blinked his eyes again, the clouding grey that had settled since his return shifted like a loose contact lens. All black. He would paint it all black, he decided. And with that he plunged his hands and arms deep into the orb until they too were stained with the blackness.

He no longer wanted to change these people, he no longer wanted to raise certain ones to a higher evolution like himself. He would be much happier without any of them he had decided. He now only wanted the world to burn. In sweet black fires.

“Nina, you’ve never looked lovelier my dear.” Samuel said to the effervescent version of Levon’s teacher.

‘So, you two are both alive, at least that is something.” She said. Levon watched as a huge bubble began and then popped out of her nose.

“Nothing broken, and we’re in the best place we can be.” Samuel said to her, turning the glass around so she could see Levon properly.

“Hey Nina.” Levon said, waving like a kid.

“You should be somewhere safe, like at the church or here. We’re about to take control of the machines at the sites. Where are you anyway?” She asked them.

“We’re at the site, BET I would imagine. And we have Aiko’s family in the next room.” Samuel said, happily as if it was all going how he planned.

“What, oh I guess that is where they would’ve taken you. Right well, we have the members taking control now. Where abouts are you in there?” She asked, calmly.

“Haven’t a clue.” Samuel said.

“Sub level 23. It says it here.” Levon said, exasperatedly, pointing to some signage over on the wall.

“Well, if you’re up to it you can assist the team; or return here. I think we need to be sensible about all this. If we can secure the machines, we can perhaps buy some time for anything else that you might have in mind.” She said to Samuel, seeming to know what he was thinking.

“Nope, I think what we need to do is to take his family to the Altered. There is a process I think Aiko will respond to.” He said, confidently.

“What, why? What’s the point, we can change everyone with our own Holy water. Why do we need to bother with Aiko?” Levon said, confused. Nina also looked as she was interested to see where he was headed with this.

The Pope sighed and looked off for a moment, taking in the room with all its contraptions and technology.

“You’ve seen how far we’ve come. How technology and ideas have pushed us further, yet more divided than ever before. Changing people into more evolved beings will not change the way they think. They allowed the world to become this way, they justified it with their own cellular developments. Aiko is the product of that ideology; he represents all that they hold dear. But we need to change the system that gave us Aiko Tsutsumi, or the way of thinking at least.” His father said assuredly.

Levon thought about this, almost comically scratching his head as it began to make sense to him.

“So if we can get to Aiko, he will represent what everyone else can do in the world, after the change. What the world will need to be.” Levon suggested. His father smiled back, nodding his head.

“Change Aiko, and you change them all then; fully?” Nina added, her face sloshing against the glass.

“Exactly.” Samuel replied. “But we need to get to them soon, as it sounds like others might have plans for them.”

“We need to get moving then. Is Jess with the order?” Levon asked, only just sparing a thought for his friend.

“She is with the team at the HET facility, so far so good I hear.” Nina said.

“And who is securing Aiko?” Levon asked. Nina paused a little.

“Well, no one. We couldn’t trace him anywhere.” She said, slightly defeatedly.

“No need to worry. He’ll come to us.” Samuel said, putting the glass with Nina’s head in it down on the side.

“He will?” Levon asked, uncertain.

“He will indeed, and probably within the hour.” He replied, and he stuck his finger into the glass. “Will be in touch Nina.” He said and swirled her face back into the clear water. Levon watched as her surprised features evaporated.

“So you have a plan then?” Levon asked him. His father looked to him, playfully offended.

“Levon, I always have a plan. It’s just people don’t know that I always do.” He replied, and with that, he set off towards the door they had watched Stefan and Dr Camogue had left through earlier. Levon couldn’t help himself, and he smiled as he sped on after him.


Keep it together (Revised edition)


The summer of 1977, in the middle of a heat wave; the estranged children of the eccentric Van-Blacks all gather at the infamous Nova-Manor to discuss recent family developments over Fourth of July weekend. Their father is dying, & now wishes to build some bridges with his children before he shuffles off the mortal coil. Things begin to take an unusual twist with the arrival of Miss T., a Jamaican fortune teller who sweeps in under an air of mystery to perform a séance.

Secrets and truths slowly unravel, helped along by the butler Mr Perkins, who knows more about the past then perhaps he should. Ghosts, storms & mysteries in the attic all explode over the holiday weekend along with the fireworks. With a body on their hands & new truths revealed, they are all forced to question whether they can live with the knowledge that someone they love is a capable of murder. Independence comes at a price, & not everything is what it seems as they try to keep it together.

Book cover - keep it together


Cremate (Redux)

Audio and visuals now featuring Tara Caribou

Break these bones into splinters.
Snap the spine and suck the sap.
Throw the pieces on the fire.
Douse it all with distain and detriment.
Do not handle me with gloves on.
Touch me deep.
Treat me like a firework, ready to alight.
Burning through like phosphors.
Strike the match on my skull.
Crinkle and crack such emotions within.
Burning down to my heart, sending my soul to embers.
Floating into your lungs to dwell forever within.


More video art at
Listen here CREMATE (ft Tara Caribou)


That sweet melody of promises you made to break.
From that little bird inside your heart.
As the daylight fades, it bursts into flames.
It’s burning wings signalling the setting sun.
Falling feathers that tickle my soul.
Oh little bird, where have you gone?
Out of the air and into the dark?
One day you will find me.
Your naked sky to soar within.
Scattering stardust in a different light.

You made this sky your own, clogging it with stars.
Oh sweet little bird, are you a phoenix in disguise?
Where have you gone, to light different skies?
I look for you always, in the midnight sun.
Hoping you’re no longer afraid of the dark.
Looking for that birdsong, to vibrate my own heart.
Aviate this dream of mine, deep in the feathers and down.
Peck it into reality.
And fly me to your moon.

Smartly Dressed Violence (Part xxiv)

Click here for previous entries  or  Listen to this episode


Secretly, Jess was amazed with herself.  It hadn’t been that long ago that she was feasting on such small scraps from the magical world she knew lay beyond her door. So tangibly there yet beyond her grasp. But with everything that had happened, the thrust into the realm had forced her to think on her feet.

She had gotten everyone back safely, navigating through time and space and magical portals. The bridge that she had been so awed by and hesitant of was now the doorway that she could pass by on in ease. The Altered had a strange way of presenting both places and timeframes, but she had been able to pass through, out and over it all. The markings on Levon’s companion were the key. Like a reboot button it allowed her to return to the Order’s main hub beneath St. Patrick’s cathedral. She would never understand the science or the magic to any learned degree, but she had felt the electricity within her bones when she had conjured and brought her family back home safely, leaving the Limbo and tickling the fringes of the Altered.

They had stumbled forth from a huge stone doorway which spewed a blueish vapour around them. The doorway, or more of a doorframe, was centred in the middle of a room similar to the laboratory crypt she had been in previously.  Around them the familiar sights of a church greeted them, but with these there were huge storage boxes, screens and strange objects which seemed to have been plucked right out of the Altered. The room was a bustle with people hastily moving about with agendas and intent. Jess and her family were greeted by members of the order who were alerted to their incoming return. Not long after they had orientated themselves, Karen entered the room from a little door hidden away at the side. She swept on up to Jess and embraced her, taking her off guard momentarily.

“Thank goodness you’re alright. And that you got back!” Karen said, breaking out of her extended embrace.

“Yes, it was pretty wild. But it was a success of sorts.” She said, casting her hand to her family to show that they were all alive and well.

“Just to get back on your own Jess, from the Limbo. That takes some doing, even with Levon’s return function. You have a grasp for the magic, it must accept you on a cellular level.” Karen said, smiling at her family.

“But where’s Levon, he disappeared after we released the pathogen. Which had no adverse effects, asides his removal. Where is he?” Jess said, putting her hand on her little brother’s shoulder, warning him not to run away as he clearly was prone to go and explore.

“He’s not here, but we know where he is. Jess, he was snatched by Atone, they intercepted during our trial of the pathogen release. It seems they have machines that can monitor the Altered and can also materialise users and objects. We’re not ignorant to this technology, we have our own trackers for the Altered; but to dematerialise from there, this is new to us. The dangers involved must be insane.” Karen said, Jess read the concern all over her face.

“But he’s alive?’ She asked urgently, worried more now.

“Yes, we know he is. He’s being held at site Bet. In one of the facilities within the towers. They also have the Pope with them, it seems they intercepted the cross activity along with another member of the order.” Karen added.

“At least he’s alive, but the Pope too. Wow. Thought he was beyond getting ensnared. So it seems they are doing their best to stop anything in the way of their plan to release the virus then.” Jess said. Her family were becoming agitated. Karen noticed this too and offered them to follow her. As they walked, jess asked what the next step was.

“Well, we will send some members to free both Levon and the Pope, but we still need to replace the virus with our own pathogen, now that thanks to you we know it works.” Karen said, leading them all down a corridor and into a huge room which had a more welcoming feel than the harshness of the church. She said her family could stay here before heading back to their home, they would be safer, and Jess agreed it would be the best for them. They settled in, taking to the huge chairs and couches while her grandmother went across to a small drinks table to mix herself something strong. Karen asked for Jess to follow her back, and after hugging her family and bidding them farewell, she followed Karen back out through the door and down the corridor.

“You’ve shown you can handle things, and indeed the magic. Jess, we’ve asked a lot of you but there is still more to do.” Karen said.

“I’m ready.” Jess said.

“We need to rescue Levon and the Pope, but we also need to stop the pandora machines. There’s one in each of the towers at the sites Het and Bet.” Karen said. They rounded into a room that was just as busy as the main one, with order members hurrying around. “Will you go to the tower in Het and switch the virus with our own Holy water. The readings we got from your family and the results of the pathogen are amazing, so we know it works”. Karen said.

“You were mapping us then?” Jess asked.

“Yes, much like Aiko’s technology we can monitor the Altered. We know the pathogen is stable now and can be released.” Karen said, excitedly.

“Great, I’m really pleased it worked. Not least because it was my family. But okay, yes; Aiko needs to be stopped. His time has come to an end.” Jess said.

“You’re telling me. Okay, you and some members will head to site Het. There may be some, umm; resistance…” Karen said, and Jess knew what she meant. Not one to look for trouble, Jess knew what the Others were likely to be like towards them, having lived for years at the end of their boots.

“I’ll try not to hurt too many people.” She replied.

“I had a feeling you could take care of yourself!” Karen said, smiling. “A rescue team, and another similar to yours will head to site Bet to do the same. We can’t seem to locate Aiko, so we have to assume he’s still moving forward as planned. Which is good for us in a way, as we know his timeframe.”

“Will Levon be okay, after he’s rescued. No damage done and all that?” Jess asked.

“He should be. There may have been some temporary reactions to the dematerialising, but we assume they are keeping them in stasis over there for some reason. They are both powerful people, and Aiko is no fool. He’ll want to keep them alive and use them.” Karen said, bringing up a screen and typing something into a system.

Jess hadn’t really had chance to stop or take things in, but she was getting used to this. She knew what was ahead of her, but she hoped that no one would be hurt. In her experience, someone always was; but enough people had suffered over the years and now it was time to end that.

“Better suit me up then, and let’s get going.” Jess said, and Karen smiled as the huge storage boxes opened up offering an array of military gear and weapons.

Levon pulled off the sensors that were stuck all over his body, pulling away more hairs than he would have liked. Fortunately, they did not trigger any disconnection alarms, or at least he hoped they weren’t silent. He prised at the connecting tube in his cylinder, forcing them to part and release him. The fluid that had covered half his body sploshed out onto the floor and washed away quickly down some metal grates. He went across to his father’s tube and pulled at his casing.

“Not opting for the clothes just yet then eh?” His father said, motioning to a rack of clothes on the side wall.

“Do you want to get out or not?” Levon asked, not seeing the humour.

“Of course, thank you. I shall look away until you are decent though. Respectfully.”  Samuel said as his own tube burst apart and the fluid sloshed outwards much like the other. They both went across and found the clothing hung up. It wasn’t their own clothes but suits that looked like they were made for astronauts more than lab technicians. Levon’s was a bit on the small side, and he held his breath as he squeezed uncomfortably in.

“How the hell are you here?” Levon asked him suddenly. His father finished zipping up the side of his suit, it shrank as it covered his body, moulding to his shape.

“Snug.” He said as the same thing happened to Levon’s.

“Were you in the Altered also then? These snatching machines must have taken us from there together and materialised us here at Atone.” Levon said, having pieced things together.

“That is quite a thing really, if you think about it. Locking on to targets like that.” Samuel said.

“They must have marker trackers that sense the energy spikes. But I didn’t know about the transporting technology.” Levon said.

“Come now, it’s not much different to stepping over. The same rules apply. But the flux of the world is the trick I imagine.” His father said, looking about the room more. Levon thought about this and agreed, it was the same principle really. With the magic, it always seemed mythical and somewhat spiritual to him. Knowing that the cold soulless world of technology had grasped something similar, saddened and worried him slightly.

“So what were you doing to get taken like that?” Levon asked his father as he put on some boots which too clasped to the outline of his feet.

“Well, you know. Save the world, stop the bad guy. The usual stuff that you have a habit of following.” His father said.

“No one really knows what you get up to do they? You lord about like some messiah, never letting people in or come close. Never giving time to explain what you are doing or why.” Levon’s frustrations were getting the better of them.

“Does it matter?” His father said bluntly. Levon looked at him, somewhat stunned.

“Don’t look at me like that. Honestly, does it really matter if the job gets done, if no one gets involved or hurt. I’m the one who sacrifices things every day, I’m the one taken to places I never wish to go. Do you not think I would like to be around and be normal, be that father figure to you solely and not the order?” He said earnestly. Levon couldn’t remember him ever talking to him like this.

“I…, I know you do good. That’s not what bothers me. It’s just, I feel like such a failure myself. I don’t deserve the gift I have, not when I see what you do and what little I can achieve.” Levon said, hoping it didn’t sound too much like a child complaining.

His father stepped forward and put his hand on his shoulder.

“That is your own journey. You can’t live yourself through someone else’s eyes. You have come here to be tested and to change from the original one that entered this material world. The evolution in your cells hurried the physical change, but spiritually are you any better than you were before?” He squeezed his son’s shoulder, endearing a closeness that neither of them had shared in years. “We both have talents and gifts; it’s how we use them that matter. We equally give and take too much and too little. I know this too.”

Levon smiled, happy to see the emotional aspect to his father instead of the absent vapour entity he had come to know.

“I guess we both need to change more.” Levon said, moving in to hug his father.

“Exactly. Maybe you a little more.” Samuel said, grinning back to his son before he thought he was being serious. “This experience has crossed our paths; I recognise that as a sign. After this we can unpack our emotions, and how we go forward. For now, we must get moving and finish what had been started. Aiko has been weakened, but his intent has only strengthened.”

“So he made an attack on the altered then?” Levon asked, knowing a lot already of Aiko’s endeavours in the magical space.

“Yes, and it’s failure has changed him in this material realm now. He’s a lot more disconnected to humanity, and willing to do more than before.” Samuel said.

“Hmm, wasn’t he before!” Levon asked.

“Let’s just say now he has something clouding his judgements.” His father said.

“Look, we’re in the Bet facility which is great as it’s where we need to be to take down Aiko’s pandora machine. We need to let the Order know we are okay.” Levon added.

“I will let them know now. Chances are they are sending members to take control of the machines at both towers.” His father said, looking around the room more. He spotted a shelf of beakers and jars, and went across to them, taking one beaker down of the shelf.

“Well, that’s good. So we should be able to help them and take control of this facility.” Levon stated, watching his father as he went across to the broken tube that he had come out of.

“We could do that, though I think they have things taken care of. Our focus should be what’s in the next room.” He dipped the beaker inside the tube, scraping it down to the bottom, filling it with some of the fluid which had remained. He lifted it out and began to swirl it around, muttering something very quietly and quickly.

“What’s so important about the Tanakas now?” Levon asked him. He saw as the clear fluid in the beaker slowly changed colour, blooming into a blue liquid.

“Well, they are Aiko’s flesh and blood after all. They are yet to play their big part in this story.” As his father said this, Nina’s face began to appear in the beaker, sloshing about the liquid.

“Nice to hear from you Samuel.” Nina said, the words bubbling to the top of the beaker.

Beauty lost at the Heron house

The world collapsed in thirty seconds there.
A beauty aged in a moment while the rose petals died.
Who faded into the future, without the knowledge of the past?
We all did.
We came once to that spot, to watch the herons dance.
To see how they cast their wing’s against a backdrop of stars.
Through tears we watched them fly, soaring along our fingertips.
But we did not know, or care to wonder;
if they’d ever return.
And the days folded into years while the crows walked across our faces.
Milking our eyes to the blurred canvas before us.
Sight dancing into all but silhouettes.
What was destroyed there, at the Heron house?
Was it love? Was it power to hold in the wells of your hand?
Surely love never dies. Love always saves the day.
But beauty was lost forever there.
When it was valued more than gold, in hearts that feared to fly.

click to watch
heron in the snow

More video art at markryan

Aftertaste of paradise

Missed the miracles, those saving graces.
Little wishes that burn and sting at the end.
For what could have saved us?
In the face of the insurmountable.
Of turned cheeks and empty pockets.
The eucalyptus chokes my lungs.
And demise weighs heavy on my soul.
Call it all what you want to.
Tack it up to the wall of my new prison.
I couldn’t belong, I didn’t believe.
The land beneath my feet felt the same as any other.
Yet the sky burned with dreams.
And the rains washed my history away.
All with you by my side.
Now a million miles later I ache for those memories.
To never fade, but to only remain unchanged.
The tangled touches of a life that was beginning to build.
Brick by brick, though the floor was made of sand.
A piece of that bliss is caught between my teeth.
Stubbornly it refuses to move.
A reckoning of intent to stay or go.
When these eyes close, it is love that coats all I see.
Housed in a land beyond the equator.
Rustling in the leaves my disposed days.
Calling like the kookaburras tapping at my mind.
Crying out to visit once more.