Winter gold

To the good times that we all share.
A rousing heat inside our hearts.
Bursting and threatening to shatter;
the dark mirrored shell that surrounds us.
At times, when lowest degrees permeate.
And latitudes of light are beyond our horizons.
We can feel it, like a rumbling thunder.
An energy of love in the soil beneath our feet.
Go barefoot into that land.
Feel the throb in your bones.
Of a light shattering out from within.
Washing the deserts in a sickening sea of joy.
For you will not drown, or even get wet.
For inside is where the water tumbles.
Scarlet rivers that bring air and reasons to your smile.
This dreamscape is cracking out of the darkness.
Like a conker out of its prickly casing.
The sleek, shiny version of self is waiting to breathe,
unsheathe, and glow in the winter’s sun.

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Emanations from the one

Bright lights twinkle on these hundred million pieces.
Locked moments of time.
Flashes of smiles now suffocated.
In a joy that squeezes and binds.
You drew the stars when the clouds robbed the sky.
In my sleep you float like a million moons on the tide.
Dust and light, blanketing my heart.
When I wake I’m still soaking in these dreams.
A bewitching glow of a secret only I know.
You, holding back the waves and the dark.
Plunging a sword into the sea of sadness.
Letting the world know I was stronger.
One kiss makes the galaxy explode.
And I live out that day, covered in starlight.
And thoughts of home.

Precious little pulse

The earth inhaled as I held my own breath.
You waited to breathe again.
Gold expanded in your lungs.
Midasly watching and waiting.
I counted the heartbeats.
The darkness between us and the moon.
Everything added up, yet made little sense.
Your bones are getting tired while you turn blue.
And a distance begins to grow in your eyes.
One kiss for good intentions.
A step back for a wrong turn.
We are angels in flight.
We were wings above the ocean of thought.
I counted each eyelash while you dreamt.
I waited for you to breathe once more.
And though you stand there with gold pouring from you.
Your smile is more precious than a sky of sapphires.
Or a river of rubies.
As we sail on, with your hand in mine.

Burn upwards

You, like a million pieces of an eclipse.
Falling on me like a Friday night.
You pepper my world with smiles.
Like stars peeking out of the black blanket of night.
You take me to such gravity.
You ask me to disengage.
A resistance that seems futile as I wash in your orbit.
Streaming down into the sapphire sway of your words.
Licking at my mind.
You, like a light in a field at night.
Leaving circles across my heart.
I count the halos. I watch for the dawn.
And you stay.

Everything (सर्वेषां स्वस्तिर्भवतु ।)

When the world wind weeps around you.
May the universe dry your eyes.
And happiness make you smile once more.
Sarvesham Svastir Bhavatu.
I cannot keep you safe from the conflict.
Or the wars within you.
But I offer you peace, from that of which I’ve known.
Sarveśām Shāntir Bhavatu.
You are taken from the mountain,.
You come in pieces.
And I too. But together we are more than less.
Sarveśām Pūrnam Bhavatu.
And if you fall, I will not catch you.
I will watch as you rise again.
And applaud your strength, with an outstretched heart.
Sarveśām Maṇgalam Bhavatu.

Infractuated

This is where the call came in.
21.09 as the tables turned.
Nothing learned, and feeling fine.
It got a little cold out there baby.
Running the whole world on your lie.
Catching time, trying not to try.
But your control used to cover you.
Now it rolls you over, and you try to let go.
But no.
She wants a little more than you offered.
Coming now to pay the piper.
That pound of flesh you carrot dangled.
Creating such frenzied envy.
And now, here comes that awful feeling.
Smudged with eyeliner and regret.
And as your mouth rolls fables like marbles.
The truth with whisky garbles, like a politician camera posing.
I know you see her. I know you wonder how it will end.
In the end, you lose.

Play dead

She lay there, with a bullet in her heart.
A world away.
A smile apart.
Reaching and tempting the heavens down.
A shuttering shame.
Like tears on a clown.
For there never was a heart at all.
No righteous tumble.
Or martyred fall.
Or even a god to share the pain.
Just empty prayers.
A messiahic shame.
For all these things played out in her head.
So she lay there silently.
Playing dead.

Tangerine

With your tangerine smile, which flavours the city.
Casting a sunburst across my eyes.
I’ll find you, where I know you’ll be.
Down by the water’s edge.
Inside my soul.
Scooping up petals and bits of memories that others left behind.
You tape them to your chest.
Quilt them to the inside of your skin.
That citrus deposition.
Sharpe and bright, welcoming me in.
You peel away the days, opening up to happiness.
Finding me at home, with your tangerine touch.
And smelling like summer.

Gallery of souls

How the love filled my heart.
Yet a size too small.
Breaking at the seams and spilling blood on the white couch.
Yet eternally it took me.
Like Moses to the mountain.
As I watched you fix your smile.
Nervously looking at the ceiling as you spoke.
Sleeping silently.
Being anything but me, anything but myself.
Wanting the world to fade, so I could be alone with you.
Just you. Swollen in a sea of scared beliefs.
And dreams that came true.
Fade to blue.
Collapsing the before into the now of the never.
As you choke the love out of me and let me breathe.
Letting you in.
As we begin.
Hanging pictures of our love, for the world to see.
And pay admission to leave.

So much clearer

Deep in the depths of history, and the things you will never see.
Heads held high.
Sweetness following the fall.
Burying the ill-gotten hand me down partial bothers.
Wrapped in tear soaked parcels and mislabelled.
Wait for the recognition to subside.
Breath, and live the new with wonder.
Crack the salt that built up in your eyes.
Those passer-by’s.
Cut the honey from you lips.
Turn down the voices that always lied.
(Nothing free is gold)
Save a little magic for the one who always smiled.
Lemonade and teddy bear parades.
The look of a child at a sight never seen.
Believe in the obscene.
The truth never told that we can all be free.
Strung up in a new history.
Bottling this hope for the future.

Love saves the day

In his heart, he couldn’t say.
Why on earth he was born that way.
And in his mind, his thoughts progressed.
His soul did ache, heave and compress.
For when he learned that there were others.
He pulled down deep within his covers.
And smiled a smile of understanding.
A powerful notion that was commanding.
That it didn’t matter if you like either gender.
It only mattered if the love was tender.
So he took their hand then stated proudly.
A message to the world yelled out so loudly.
That he loved them the most, come what may.
And in the end, love saves the day.

Build me a coffin

We never let tomorrow in, as we ricochet between now and then.
Climbing the mountain each day, never taking the leap.
Of faith.
In the dark.
Holding on to the dying heart.
That beats for the decay.
I want to crawl my fingers to the sunlight.
Drop these excuses which weigh me down.
If not now, then when?
Building a coffin for this dying friend.
This soul I’ve exhausted and run into the ground.
Outgrown and exploited.
Let me howl at the moon in its crumbling position.
Clinging to the last breath.
This static disposition.
My mouth wants new dreams to sink into.
My soul needs to take flight on different wings.
Lay my old self down in the ground. Mark this place.
A memory of the lost and found. Not to be forgotten.
Tomorrow waits for no-one. It’s running at the speed of life.
My blood is stinging now with love and adrenaline.
Pushing me forward to the amazing unknown.
Out of these four walls.
Out of the space.
Crashing into the future with a smile that says ‘lead, don’t follow’.

Skirt your soul

Coughing on the brick dust.
Not complaining.
Just re-arranging.
This sanctuary you’ve housed us in.
Licking the light that shines through the stained teared windows.
You cover me in everything.
You wrap me around you like a piece of string.
Feeling the blood pump through these veins.
Skin on skin. Lips to lips.
With an infinity smile you harken me forward.
Out of this church of our hearts.
The fresh mountain air hits my lungs.
Breathing in the butterfly breath of your exhale.
You tomorrow’s sigh.
Hand gripped and stable. Grounded when I was falling apart.
Steadied my soul.
And when I was letting go, you let me fly.
Soar.

Stanley

Stanley wanted nothing more.
Then a pair of new trainers, like the boy next door.
So he went to the shops and emptied his pockets.
But some coins, a tissue and small toy rocket.
Could not amount to the high priced brand.
And he was asked to leave by the security man.
So Stanley went away for a while.
But then came back, with a cheeky smile.
And he stole those shoes, from right under their nose.
And wore them home, in such comfortable toes.
But alas, this was not the end for Stanley.
Who began to steal more things, which made him feel manly.
He moved on to televisions and peddling dope.
At only 15, he was beyond all hope.
Of ever being on the straight and narrow.
Hitting the underworld, fast like an arrow.
So don’t surprised if you come across Stan.
Shoplifting in Tesco or hot wiring a van.
For if you try to talk him, set out a plan.
He’ll flip you the finger, and steal your gran.
(Crime doesn’t pay…always)

White out

Counting September’s smile.
Through the cracks in her teeth.
The gaps in the earth that let me in.
Bark stripped and predicted.
Rushing memories through me like electrolytes.
Treading sacred steps though time
Within the cells of mother earth.
Help me to the surface, to gulp the air of immortality.
For I choose the waters that I’m in.
Bringing down the reign.
Throwing flowers at the seasons, hoping they stick.
Waiting for winter’s incumbent snow.
Lodged forever in this tender heart.
White out. Breathe.

Lemonade

Like I wouldn’t know you’re the reason.
Before you, there was such terrain.
Speak your name, quietly with religious respect.
Licking you like I would a sweet prayer before bedtime.
Tasting your wonder on my tongue.
Excuse me if this makes you uncomfortable, you just don’t know the marvel you’ve become.
I box your words like chocolates.
Closing the doors in my soul and opening the windows.
Slipping in to your loveliness. That day, the day the avalanche came.
That’s who you are.
Dipped in brilliance. Making me walk like a cat.
So happy to show me.
Dress you up like a store front window. Make me bow.
Bringing my happy back again.
Take me there.

The Dye is cast

You try to love again but you’re miles away.
You throw out words like a tourist lost in the city, all broken English.
I love you.
It sounds so odd to hear.
Like you’re naked and cast ajar, with the window open as the world tumbles in.
….and I slip away.
I’ve lived these words, I’ve breathed that world.
I crashed and burned into that wonder that found me hearing the echo of the sound of I love you.
I got sick with it, lived with it, threw up and fucked it.
And so it remains.
Buried deep within, washing around in my blood.
The light flickers and I catch your smile. Too different for our own good, it cages the bird within me.
A victim or volunteer, I still do not know.
You speak to my soul and play my thoughts like a piano, you move away from others.
Everyone around me tells me the world is flat.
When I tell you it is round; you smile and hold my heart and whisper “it is also surrounded by stars”.
And now I know.
The dye is cast