Emanations from the one

Bright lights twinkle on these hundred million pieces.
Locked moments of time.
Flashes of smiles now suffocated.
In a joy that squeezes and binds.
You drew the stars when the clouds robbed the sky.
In my sleep you float like a million moons on the tide.
Dust and light, blanketing my heart.
When I wake I’m still soaking in these dreams.
A bewitching glow of a secret only I know.
You, holding back the waves and the dark.
Plunging a sword into the sea of sadness.
Letting the world know I was stronger.
One kiss makes the galaxy explode.
And I live out that day, covered in starlight.
And thoughts of home.

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My choice, completely

In your mind of turpentine, in your soul of sadness.
Dwells a fear, that pulls you near; that on it’s own is madness.
By many names it calls itself. By many ways it shows.
A caring culture, an emotive vulture. A consideration grows.
But what it is I have for you, isn’t fake or spineless.
It’s unconditional, an endless sea. A true love that is selfless.

I miss my ocean

Sand. Dirty sand and soil.
Dust in my mouth and coating this skin.
A film of sweat covers me.
Sticky heat and restless.
I miss my sea, the ocean that bore me.
Tranquil and deep like the pools in my mind.
To drift and meander across its aqua stretches.
Calms the blood that torrents through me.
I miss my sea, my ocean.
At times stormy, but full of life.
Threatening to pull me down to the ocean floor.
Where I can be alone, and able to heal.
The arid heat and air of this desert itches my eyes.
Scratches at the very thought of going on another day.
The salty air calls me back.
A maelstrom of reasons directing my compass.
To ride over waves and rise with Atlantis.
Reaching a trident back up to god.
So I shall make my way, and crawl back into the sea.
One which always welcomes and cherishes me.
Washing everything clean, and cooling my soul.
I miss my ocean.
I miss my sea.

Leviathan

You might never know it’s there.
It’s been quiet for so long.
Dormant, but strong like indecision.
The Leviathan of the soul.
Lying in its own blackness, biding its time.
It’s older than you, it came before us all.
Moving and shaping like the clouds across the sky.
It does not seek the calm waters, or the tangerine days of summer.
It comes with the storms, the hurricanes of the heart.
When your bow is breaking, and you’re taking on water.
When you are barely holding things together.
Caught on rocks and the shallows of shame.
It seizes those moments.
Gripping you in its darkened grips of despair.
Blocking out the sun with its inky nightmare.
Pulling you down fathoms gasping for air.
To float forever in the torrid turpentine seas below.

Taken from Leviathan of the soul

The fall will kill us both

Walking on this wire, I see the sea below us.
Cool and deep like the thoughts of mother earth.
Take my hand, there is nothing to catch us if we tumble.
Down into the shark filled ponds of loneliness.
Where our bones will turn to coral.
And you will dig down into the sand.
Foot follows foot as we walk.
Inching along the eggshell laden rope.
Banana skin memories drop like raining frogs.
I profit from my certainty, that these plagues are temporary.
Hold me if I slip, and I will catch you if you stumble.
Walking on this wire. We must be careful.
Because the fall will kill us both.

So deep, so central

Pretty pieces, pretty please.
Tie these moments down to my knees.
Kiss me once and kiss me twice.
Run your fingers through my life.
Rock me to sleep with your cooing words.
Then fly me to the moon on big lunar birds.
Or down to the depths like ocean horses.
Singing softly songs in subterranean choruses.
That drift out of caves, and onto the tide.
Covered in shells down deep where I hide.
Because it’s in your arms, and in your heart.
Where I crawl when things get dark.
And touch your warm skin when mine’s like stone.
For in your eyes, it feels like home.

Salt in the soul

What do you do, when cannot breathe inside?
As the voices pull and call you out to sea.
Caught on the tide of time.
The sun sweats out the salty dreams.
Moments of disconnection.
Burning and fizzing in the heat and spray.
On a day, far from over.
And though you try to ride the tide of change.
You only get battered, smashed against the rocky shores of truth.

Savage reconstruction of self

Through heavy storms this heart doth beat.
Battle born and weary.
Feathers frayed liked angelic irony.
Patched and nearly severed.
Where do you go to be reborn?
While wolves lick between your teeth.
And though pregnant hopes swell and ebb.
Through cobweb sticky emotions, and distance in your eyes.
The cries of sincere doubt corrode quickly in your salty waves.
Smashed into pieces upon your unwelcoming rocky shore.
Yet something crawls out of the ocean.
Something that slayed the terrors of the deep.
To reach up and scale that towering mountain.
That you placed there to warn those out to sea.
Of how close to god you now sit and suffer.
How away from us you wish to be.

Mother

Out of the dark, like a Pisces rising.
The ship of salvation on this sanctified horizon.
Oh mother, why do those tears of glass never shatter?
Who wipes away those beads when the world turns over?
We hum the hymns in a frantic manner.
Coughing up rosaries like pearls from the sea.
Yet a pain in your heart vibrates underfoot.
Quaking the earth and displacing my faith.
Not in you, oh mother, the salvation in my sadness.
But in a world I find as sticky as tar, and dark as oil.
Resistant to your holy water.
Tis such vanity I make your image so beautiful.
Mirroring the love I have for my mother of body.
The one I share cells with.
Divine DNA.
So I roll my eyes back, and taste the pain away.
Losing your son.
As impotent as God to intervene in fate.
And I pray, and kiss your blessed feet.
Giving up the holy image in my mind.
Loving you for the first time,
as someone who I always knew.

Octopus

Cracks in the colossus.
Licking time across new wounds.
Limping and lumbering back into the ocean of your eyes.
Taking lifelines.
That little notepad you kept in your desk.
Right behind your mind.
Scribbling a sonnet for thine truth to break.
And a storm to release.
Sweeping up all the worries and the fish from the bottom of the sea.
I bottled up these sea storms.
The swell in your day.
But you pick and poke at the cork and the corrections.
To then complain that you are soaking wet.
What fable lives now in that oily deep?
What treasures do you covert, claw at and keep?
For in my mind too swim a thousand sharks.
Tasting blood in the water.
And it’s tough, stuck; no longer able to swim.

TAKE MY FORGOTTEN

Do you know, this all feels the same now.
Eyes that hang down with gravity.
Tender but so tired.
Reproachful fingers that feel their way to my shoulder.
Checking I’m still here.
Scared to touch, but desperate to comfort.
My refugee emotions lay claim to nothing.
Stolen of their gold, now left to hang like robbed out trees.
Fruit rotting on the floor.
Don’t kill my dreams then tell me I’ll live forever.
How much of the dark do you expect me to see?
No, the world is a vast ocean to me now.
And I’ve always been afraid of the water.

The World Beneath

Hold your breath. Count to ten.
Join the depths of the world beneath.
An inversed galaxy that never ends.
With lotus flower eyes you can see if you listen.
The aquatic hum of a sight leagues beneath your bones.
You are the octopus that crawled back to the sea.
The Sinking ship which will haunt the ocean floor.
Poseidon blood tingles in your veins as you descend.
To the world beneath, the silent watery grave where the weeds dance.
Each wave washes away your grey.
And every day your Atlantis awaits.

Adeline

Adeline, why do you trouble me so?
Why do you pull down the stars and the moon?
Chalking up these eyes with lunar dust and wonder.
Oh Adeline, do not speak my name.
It crumbles my ground and shakes my resolve.
Moving my inner mantle with volcanic changes of heart
Oh sweet Adeline, keep those lips the distance of the sun.
Rising from my eastern treasure like the dawn.
Blinding if I look that way.
My Adeline, I wish I knew you then.
When my world could make a house for you.
In the forest of fidelity when we were both young.
Goodbye Adeline, you will always dwell in my hope chest.
Covered in gold at the bottom of the fathoms.
Yet locked away in time by a key you will never own.

You stopped the rain

What becomes of all of us?
Down in the depths, floating on the sea of time.
Who pulls us back? Who throws the ropes of salvation?
She dwelled long and lonely under the waves.
Wrinkling into memory as the salt clogged her bones.
But the dreams wouldn’t fade like a dying star.
The hope threaded around her heart like roots of a tree.
New lips breathed the life back into her.
Tomorrow’s soul and eternity’s hand.
Raised her from her watery grave.
Covering her in love and picking away the scabs of sorrow.
She smiled and laughed as they ignited within the pilot fire.
Which shifted fate, and scared the fish.

Following the flotsam

Twilight dances, the wild alive and static.
Fingertips on edge, itching for the sun.
A tantric lullaby to soothe and comatose.
Sing me to sleep with oceanic melodies.
Ones you found in those subterranean caverns.
Notes glide like crests of waves.
Kissing my brain.
Stealing my tremor urge of feet wandering.
Making for the door.
I sailed around the sky, and anchored to your heart.
Searching for myself, yet finding you at the ends of the earth.
Careful not to fall.
To plummet into my own destruction.
Cursing blindly at them all that the world is flat.
While you slip inside and spin my rhythm.
Pushing me off the horizon.
And sailing to the stars.

Crawling back to the sea

Did I miss the Milky Way?
Seeping into my bones while I sleep.
Creeping over my soul like a love I can’t keep.
Forgetting how this feels.
If I am nothing but confused, then I know.
I know what I must do.
I welcome in the deportation.
Listening at the water’s edge.
The primitive sound of the sea of tranquillity.
Lapping at my soul.
An ocean of storms, propagating emancipation.
So annotate my departure now.
Hang it on your wall, and drink it from your coffee cup.
Diminished and exonerated in your eyes unfit for the lunar surface.
They would pop under the pressure of all the world upon you.
Like the path I tread. Or the self I give away.
Where is the road I follow? The crater to jump?
I told you all along about the universe at my doorstep.
But I know you wanted me to be wrong.
All along.
But you forgot how I can swim.
So I shoot myself across this space and walk into the sea.
And you fall down to your knees.

Heaven in retrograde

These seas are evaporating, leaving sand in my ear.
As I hold the shell of you close to me.
In the dizzying haze of electric blue, you stutter and sub verse.
Wiping it all a jet black as the magic calls your name.
Echoes from the past and the end of the dark cave.
Down in the belly of the earth.
These tears you birth, are explosions in your eyes.
What correlation sucks the root and turns the tide?
A wash once again with salty words and dismay.
This heaven I’m leaving, is but a dying star.
The moon sliced in two; like an apple, cored and bored through.
Suffocated in your new supernova of smiles.
Waiting to be born again, holding tight to these expectations.
Holding onto this honey in my hands.
Trapping it forever in amber.

Sting

The rapid heartbeats within me, shake me like a train track.
You drip through the air like mercury.
Holding your titanium crown aloft for the world to see.
Silently the world waits, as I hold my breath and disposition.
You swim to me in an ocean of darkness.
Bringing destruction that clouds my mind like ink.
Each words carefully uttered, flipped away with an arrogance you wear like skin.
They bruise and dent me, beating me up like a tin can in the street.
Silky words those lips sometimes utter, liked boxed poems and chocolate.
A look that can roll me in sugar.
Not today though.
Now is the time of toxic temperaments.
And words that cut like a knife and sting.
I can’t be immune as you turn your back on me.
So let me cry my eyes out into your ocean;
so you’ll never see them fall.

Where do you go?

When this world takes over me.
Smoking stars and twilight.
This impossible process of living.
Breathing each time the same.
Where do you go to?
Down into the ground with the bones.
Up to the sky with the feathers.
Swimming for now in this sea of uncertainty.
Where do I find you when I need that earthy voice?
That stone rooted soul that flicks away the flies of remorse.
Seek and thee shall find, but you are absent in this moment.
Gone away with the fairies as I relapse into tinkerbell tendencies.
I will find you there, I swear.
Caught between the tide and heaven.
Sailing our love to the ends of the world.
You be the captain.
And we’ll be forever saved.
Drifting on the tide around Saturn.

Fluorescent future

4am as the world whispers me awake.
All is calm, and the night travels in my veins still.
I slept the day away.
Rubbing the tiredness and memories from my eyes.
Half a world away, yet right where I started.
Right where I belong.
The veil is yet to be lifted form my shaded stay.
Talking to me still from the past in a language I slightly recognise.
Talks of entangled vines and harkening songs.
The red land beneath my feet.
Sticking to me like sand on wet skin.
Rub away these English oaks. This chitter of festivity.
Don’t lead me blind with your patriotic stories.
Colour me sunlit gold and let me sleep.
Crying into the night.
Drifting away on the tide.

Sea salt on my skin

Not looking for anything to interrupt this morning.
Yet came it did.
Hurried through these bones like a freight train.
Cutting me deep.
Such hurt on the telephone.
Transistor tears and unravelling years.
Wiping away tomorrow.
Those words.
Not letting me.
Melted down like mediocrity.
One wish was to take me to higher ground.
To say goodbye.
As the waves lapped at my feet.

Holding back the waves

Heat rivals such memories.
Burning a hole through my soul.
Desert licking as my heart contorts.
Coughing up a dry dusty apology.
Limp in the midday sun.
Yet still I stand, awash with remorse and resolve.
Unable to drown in your sorrow.
Afraid to swim in your sadness.
Washed up, I watch as your gather all your hope.
Bottling shooting stars and dreams.
Plucking shadows from me, stuck on this ship.
As it rains on us.
I once tried to drain your oceanic heart.
My eyes dissolved from all the tears.
Washed away in the monsoon rains.
So you sit and wait.
Waiting for someone else to care.
At your water’s edge.
Where you still find me, threatening to jump.
Threatening to retreat.
Still hoping to save you.
Trying to hold back the waves.

Raging storm

Your clouds are black.
Coffee stained and lava grey.
Swirling and destroying like a tornado touching down.
Soaking me in rain dripped misery.
Sucking the bolts from my foundation.
There’s no calm in your storm.
No eye to your needle of chaos.
Swelling your seas in the face of my defiance.
Shouting into the winds of your frustration.
But you are just a ragging storm.
Lost in my lonely hurricane.