So central

This illuminating version.
Drifting.
Loving, only when the time is right.
When it’s uncalled for.
Who knew?
Who cared?
A scorched soul while the film played on.
And all roads led to the same.
Your heart curdled up tight.
Wearing out my mind.
Melting the plastic of the world we once inhabited.
Central now.
Gaining control of a need that was needed.
Crazy, only to know we were always driving.
Using our knees to steer.
Hoping to crash and burn.
In a beautiful, all consuming fire.
So central to our survival.

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Stalling

A rusted heart, worn by tears.
Breaking down, in a broken town.
This heartbreak city of shattered dreams.
The water got into the fuel.
The hate got into the love.
Churned and exhausted all.
How long were we running on empty?
As the metal flayed and tore into our flesh.
Juttering to a stop, a stalling of hearts.
Roll down the windows of our eyes, and see where we have ended up.
A place I hate to be, detoured and gotten lost.
The wheels are coming to a stop.
Stalling, and likely to forever remain.
Or to corrode in your acid rain.

You won’t, but you might

Please don’t hurt me, you don’t understand.
It’s my heart that is beating, bleeding there in your hand.
And forgive this emotion and whispering plea.
But it longs to be loved, not stamped and set free.

As it’s nearing the end, the potential is high.
For it to crumbled right there, and for this dream to die.
So I ask you again, as I would an old friend.
To think for a moment, to heal and then mend.

Then keep it safe in your heart, swimming in blood red and dark.
A scar on your soul, as we fade and grow old.
Then kiss me and say, you’ve decided to stay.
And all the shadows you will chase away.

Weapon of choice

It’s so hard, just to peel back the truth.
Like folding back the sky.
Propping up heaven while we renovate.
Dusting under the throne, sweeping under the rug.
How much is caught in your eye?
As the verbal rocks are thrown?
Hammering now in your head.
Leaving idealism to another time, another life.
Dropped in the ocean to be covered in coral.
We slaughter the fledgling feelings, new to hope.
Eager to walk in the sunlight holding hands.
We never understand, how to break the cycle.
Going round and round. Like a falling plane.
Spiralling, tumbling, freewheeling to the ground.
You pin the medal of victory to your chest.
Pricking the skin, letting the blood flow.
Straightening your soul, patting your ego on the back.
Mumbling incoherently the art of war.
Driving your tank over the art of love.

Gallery of souls

How the love filled my heart.
Yet a size too small.
Breaking at the seams and spilling blood on the white couch.
Yet eternally it took me.
Like Moses to the mountain.
As I watched you fix your smile.
Nervously looking at the ceiling as you spoke.
Sleeping silently.
Being anything but me, anything but myself.
Wanting the world to fade, so I could be alone with you.
Just you. Swollen in a sea of scared beliefs.
And dreams that came true.
Fade to blue.
Collapsing the before into the now of the never.
As you choke the love out of me and let me breathe.
Letting you in.
As we begin.
Hanging pictures of our love, for the world to see.
And pay admission to leave.

ANT EMPIRE

Discovered by mistake, that breaking heart hidden under the couch.
Locked in the cupboard.
Buried beneath the earth.
And if it broke, and if I died; what world is left behind?
A towering empire of loose threads.
Pulled at many moments in a life undone.
Towering up to god, my shaking finger of Babel.
Crying out in many tongues to a deaf creator.
The holder of my heart.
These racing rats and spiders which crawl over me at night.
What a sight, it is to see a hollow mind explode inside out.
My little world of mistakes, dew drops to effort.
A treasured time where the earth held still.
And I held my breath, for you looked inside.
And watered my garden.
Tended to the flower that had crawled away from the sun.
My tiny empire, rebuilt by the one.

35 degrees under ice

Broken and bleeding.
With sticks to keep my eyes open.
You left me, healing,
Asleep under winters duvet.
How scared was I when the nights rolled in.
Dark, and threatening, to never lift.
You said the tears would fix the wound.
The fox call, which entered the room.
Covering everything that was beginning to get cold.
You promised to make things better.
Nourish my leaf fell heart and welcome the spring of together.
Taking my hand to brace against the weather.
Which only heightened the storm inside me.
The tempest of old memories.
Old moments that lowered my pressure.
A winter’s flurry, to freeze the pain.
Hoping I could love again.

WICHITA EYES

In the night they burn.
Fireflies trapped in an amber jar.
Smelling the sand on my skin.
The dust-bowl offerings to a world of plenty.
Wichita eyes follow me.
Bar stamped and ready. Hovering over something entirely.
Waiting to be consumed.
Where do you go now motel boy?
Burning holes through my skin.
Somersaulting in and turning my blood to milk.
The day fades away, blackening the eyelids of the young.
The eyes always ready.
Waiting for tomorrow.

Graffitied heart

“If Graffiti changed anything it would be illegal”

A Little side project; a small little book of Rhymes and poems. Graffitied heart is out now in ebook and Paperback. Though it may seem pricey, the Paperback is fully illustrated and is in glorious colour. I hope you enjoy it.

‘A well-travelled heart sees it all, from street to street and wall to wall. 
Soaking in life’s wonderment, from euphoric highs to the deep laments.
This heart is stained, bruised and scarred. Still beating, just graffitied; and bursting to show you what it’s seen.
Graffitied Heart is a little book of rhymes and poems, going through the alphabet of existence. And as with all lives, they can be humorous, horrifying and heartening. A compendium of complexities for your enjoyment.’ 

For more info on other titles, click here.

OUT NOWGH

Begin the begin

Falling freeways that collapse like thunder.
Splattering dust into my open heart.
The sun shines on, blanketing our eyes with dizzying despair.
That road was to the sea, the ocean that promised such departure.
The great wide expanse that echoed home.
So we look above.
Counting trails and streaks across the sky.
Fighter jets and passengers making their escape.
Crawling, flying and fretting to other cities.
Other sights of wonder.
My mind melts into now and I collect my possessions.
All packed into one golden shell I carry in my pocket.
It whispers your name, it breathes your air.
Cinnamon cords that play forever on my lungs.
I crack this pumpkin sky and break on through.
The open road, a littered landscape of longing.
Making my way to you once more.
Stabling the state of mind i’m in.
Begin the begin.

Glass

I buried your words in a glass in the garden.
Trapped them like fireflies in the twilight of this trying.
This break, splinter, shatter.
Tucked them all in, away in the dirt.
You look up when you’re not sorry.
Telling me lies long into the night.
Shattering my glass heart and stepping on the pieces.
Complaining of the sound it makes.
Never once indestructible.
The thunder came, the rains fells.
The lightning struck as the storm of you raged on.
Turning my glass heart back to into sand.
Reduced to grains of love.
Leaving it in this new lonely desert.

Sky stained satin

Your eyes picked out the moon that night.
Reflecting lunar memories and utopia.
I remember the rain on your skin.
And those words you had held deep within.
The goodbye corroded my heart and the lava love.
Those volcanic changes of emotions that shook my soul.
Whispering words you hoped I never heard.
And you shot us down like a low flying bird.
Flicking away the dew drops that had stained your eyelashes.
Flicking away both me and pieces of the past.
You pulled that heart out of me.
Leaving me to breathe underwater in a black lonely sea.
The lights shift. Cracking to burn as you departed.
Lighting your way into a new design.
Somewhere in my memory, that rain never ends.
The moon will shine off your skin like Saturns rings.
And the twilight will stick to my eyelids like sleep.
Somewhere before that I will always be kissing you.
Where the sky is stained purple, and the rain pulls down.
And love still courses through my heart.

Way to your heart

What keeps us warm when the rain covers all?
What brought us here, what was our fall?
Who keeps you safe when the fires smoulder on?
Who is your light, keeping you strong?
Which god do you turn to when pain wastes your heart?
Who leads you back, right to the start?
I fired a shot out into the nothingness.
Into the void, that cold strange abyss.
I cried for you when the pain drew near.
Yet you keep me away in sad lonely fear.
Where do you go when world leaves you cold?
What do you do when your dream isn’t sold?
Who dries your eyes when tears corrode the gold?
When you realises, it’s all as you have been told?
I’ll make a bed for you inside me.
I’ll keep you safe, contented and free.
I’ll breathe the trust in where it belongs.
And I will love you just like I have all along.

Efflorescence

Do you feel the change in weather?
The heart beating for the very first time.
Get down on the ground and listen to the soil.
The trumpeting pound of nature’s pride.
Beating like a dominance in my body.
Listen to my flesh as the drum beat breathes and sighs.
You turn a seasons within, devoid of the frost of winter.
Bathed in only the crystal glaze of summer.
Always sunny when you look my way.
A twice look biscuit fire that scorches my soul.
But I do not burn, I bloom.
Mesmerised and polarised in the dew drops of your joy.
The pounding of the flowers in the spring of your step.
Thump as the earth shakes.
Gasp with each breathe.
Gardening in twilight as you sleep when I wake.

Bleed air

Wait for the dust to settle.
A hurt that’s wrapped tightly in a bandage.
Squeezed into numbness.
You asked me here, you want me to stay.
But to remain means deserting me.
Leaving myself alone to drift into space.
You handle my heart so coarsely.
Picking off the dirt that reminds me of my past.
Scars that taught me not to break.
To catch you, half a world away; lost in the fog of tomorrow.
Cancelling time zones as the tock and the tick irritate.
And your kiss, inebriates it all.
This Atmosphere changes everything.
Up here, I cannot see the fall.